Ever since she was a child, Allie had possessed the Knowing. It was a trait that was passed down from mothers to first-born daughters since her ancestors made history as being among the first women burnt for alleged witchcraft. Knowing enabled her to perceive events before they happened, to have a sense of where things belonged or fit and to understand or have empathy on a deeper level than most.
As if being saddled with a name like Allegra - she'd shortened it to Allie around the time she turned twelve - wasn't bad enough, she was also cursed with Knowing. It annoyed the hell out of her that she actually realised why her parents said or did the things they did or that she was able to find things in the kitchens or bedrooms of friends, purely because she felt called to where they belonged. During her teenage years, she was both feared and revered as a kind of relationship Oracle because she knew who belonged together and who were better off being friends. It really took the surprise out of her own life too. She already knew, long before her peers, that she would become a teacher and move around the world until she met the person she would grow old with.
"But isn't that reassuring?" said Becca, her best friend. Allie never knew whether she would have chosen Becca as a friend if the Knowing hadn't told her that they would be bosom buddies from their first day at school. "I mean, the rest of us have to struggle to figure out what we want from life while you already have it all mapped out for you. Doesn't it take the pressure off?"
"Imagine waiting to read an amazing book, or watch a movie that you think is going to be awesome."
"Yes, I'm there. It's the new Outlander series, by the way." Becca closed her eyes.
"Right. Now imagine that, while you're watching, there are these annoying pop-ups on the screen with spoiler alerts for what will happen next. And you can't turn them off and you can't not look or unsee them."
Becca frowned. "Spoiler alerts can be helpful sometimes. I could've done with that the time Jamie got flogged or the whole Wentworth Prison episode with Black Jack Randall. Or the time when Fergus..."
Allie sighed, and put her hands on Becca's shoulders. "It's a bit different when it's your life, Becca. There's nothing to look forward to anymore. I sometimes feel like I am a pawn in someone else's script."
"Oh, like that movie when the character breaks through the fourth wall and realises the author's going to kill him?"
"Not that extreme, but yeah. It's the same feeling."
Becca nibbled on her popcorn. "Do you sometimes wish you hadn't been born with it?"
"Sometimes. I want to feel normal, for once. To have life surprise me."
"I think it will, Allie. You don't know everything. Or I'd have made you give me the winning numbers for the lottery ages ago."
Allie laughed. "It doesn't work like that."
"Right? And you also don't know who it is that you're going to end up meeting while you're travelling around the world. You already know that you will. So you can focus on becoming a great teacher and let the Universe do its thing with your love life."
"I wonder how the Universe knows who is right for me. I haven't even had a boyfriend yet. I mean, it's not that I haven't dated, but none of the guys I went out with would have been worth the effort."
"See, that's where I envy you. Imagine if I had known that Roger would turn out to be such a prat. I could've saved myself so much heartache." Becca bit her lip. "Wait, you did tell me he was a loser, didn't you? And I ignored you." She slapped her forehead with her palm.
"Just because I know doesn't mean I can interfere with your free will. Besides, Roger helped you realise that laser tattoo removal is both painful and expensive."
"Yep. That's the last time I ink some twit's name on my body. Lesson learnt." She sat up on her bed and adjusted her ponytail. "Are you ready for your big move?"
"I know I am. I have everything sorted. Now it's simply a case of boarding the plane and getting to the other side."
"I can't believe you're going to be living in Europe. And in Germany of all places. Wait, why did you pick Germany again?"
"I don't know if I picked Germany or if it picked me. It's like that with most things. I mean, did I pick you or..."
"Hey, hey, hey. We both know that I picked you out from all the pigtailed brats and we became best friends forever. You didn't even know where the bathroom was on that first day, remember?"
"You're never going to let me live that one down. I've told you a million times, I was nervous. It was stressful. So many people at once and so much to sense about all of them. I was trying to process everything."
Becca snorted. "Yeah, yeah. I'll pretend I believe you. Promise me one thing? Don't let your gift stop you from enjoying what's in front of you. Sometimes it's OK to ignore the Knowing and just let your hair down a little."
"I'm not trying that again," said Allie. "We almost got arrested last time."
"But we also got a great story out of it. Promise me you'll think about it, OK?"
Becca's voice was loud in her mind as Allie stood on the platform at the train station. The conversation might have happened in her friend's childhood bedroom more than a year ago, but she never forgot the essence of what Becca was asking her to do. She'd had a long day at work and wanted nothing more than to take the train home so that she could relax. She knew she had to catch the U6 but something told her, against the Knowing, to make a beeline for the U2. She fought the urge to step aboard the U6 that opened its greased hinges in front of her and retraced her steps to the plaza where the lines split. Alexanderplatz was buzzing with tourists, locals, beggars and hungry people eager to grab American grub for their dinner. Usually the Knowing made navigation easy; she never got lost and simply followed the route her feet took. Now, having decided to find another train, she felt disoriented and scanned the signposts for clues as to which direction she needed to take.
Trying to ignore the necklace of cold sweat on the back of her neck, she turned a tiled corner and felt the Knowing switch on again with the same force as a power surge. She spotted a man in a black jacket straight ahead of her. He was studying the route plan for the U2, tracing his finger along the line and comparing it to a map in his right hand.
At that moment, Allie felt uncertain, which was unexpected given her gift. All her emotions seemed to bellyflop, leaving her with the feeling of being unmoored on a stormy sea. The Knowing must have left her again. All those nights of begging to be rid of it had brought her to this point and now, more than ever, she wanted it back. How was she supposed to act? What was she supposed to say? What would happen next?
After circling a stop on the map with his finger, he pocketed it and turned to face her. She felt his gaze hit her like a speeding bus.
"Hello," he said. "Are you lost?"
Her mouth was dry. "I was about to ask you the same thing." When he frowned, she added, "You were staring at the route for a long time."
"Oh, right. No, I'm from here. I was trying to decide which train to take. I like to mix it up every so often. But your accent isn't local."
She smiled. "No. I moved her a year ago. I'm Allie."
"Christopher." He smiled and stared past her at the boards indicating when the next train would arrive. "You sure you aren't lost?"
"Actually, I'm meant to take the U6 home, but I took a different turn."
"You're in luck. I'm taking the U6 myself."
"Weren't you were looking at the U2 back there?"
He smiled. "Plans change. Shall we?"
The second he touched her back, it felt as though oxygen was released into a vacuum and she could breathe again. They began talking, and it was easy to share. She loved the quirks of his speech and the way he made her feel comfortable. Even the Knowing hadn't prepared her for how good this would feel. Or how right.
"I forgot to ask which stop you get," he said. "I was enjoying our chat so much."
She hadn't paid attention to where they were going, and when they reached the end of the line, it came as a surprise. "Me too. I can't remember when last time stood still for me like that."
"Well, I know a great pizza place four stops from here. How about we get off there and then continue?"
"Only if they serve Chianti."
"Uh, is the Pope Catholic?"
She laughed and as the train jolted, she fell backwards only to be pulled upright and into his arms. Without thinking, she wrapped herself around him. Allie sighed.
"What was that about?" He led her off the train and up the subway stairs.
"Oh, nothing. I was thinking how glad I am that I got lost tonight."
"You and me both," he replied.
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